+ four30 project +

new photos for the four30 project.

just something fun i'm doing for myself, instead of a 365, and no other reason. new pictures added to it this week:

+ fridaaaay +

so missy over at ohmissyme tagged me and some other ladies to fill this out. i hardly ever do these, but figured hey, it's friday. i will. enjoy reading. [thank you missy, you're a doll!]

1. Where is your cell phone: on my desk, on my mousepad, so that when it buzzes my co-workers don't freak out.
2. Your hair: long-haired brunette. bangs today, actually.
3. Your mother: is where i get my smile from.
4. Your father: is where i get my love of reading from.
5. Your favorite food: pita and hummus, probably.
6. Your dream from last night: odd things. always such odd things.
6. Your favorite drink: lemonade. or a peppermint mocha.
7. Your dream/goal: to never stop loving, creating, or exploring.
8. What room are you in: office at work.
9. What is your hobby: making whatever i need, thrifting, painting, drawing, going on walks, piano, reading, graphic design, writing, photography.
10. What is your fear: wasting time & opportunities i can't get back. missing out.
11. Where do you want to be in 6 years: at peace.
12. Where were you last night: saving darling kristin from boys, playing with her precious kittens and eating her muffins. oh, and studying.
13. Something you are not: sure of what i'm doing.
14. Muffins: lovelovelove.
15. Wish list items: more time outside, quieter friends.
16. Where did you grow up: florida & alabama
17. Last thing you did: went to the park & took pictures on my lunchbreak.
18. What are you wearing: bumming today! jeans and asu hoodie.
19. Your TV: i don't watch tv.
20. Your pets: i miss my puppy. :(
21. Your friends: there are too many, hehe.
22. Your life: is full of revelations about how badly i succeed at doing what i want.
23. Your mood: antsy and ready to get off work.
24. Missing someone: yes. always.
25. Vehicle: is surprisingly clean on the outside, but needs a carwash. :( anyone?
26. Something you’re not wearing: shoes.
27. Your favorite store: anthropologie.
28. Your favorite color: i do not believe in favorite colors.
29. When’s the last time you laughed: a few minutes ago.
30. When’s the last time you cried: this morning.
31. Your best friend: finally lives in the same state as me as of last month. YES.
32. One place you go over and over: the past.
33. One person who emails me regularly: lydia.
34. Favorite place to eat: fez, jeni's, lux, or anywhere i haven't tried.

- - -

in other news, i'm trying to figure out how to combine everything i want to do and know into a major, or at least a double major. or maybe a double major with a double minor. to hell with it, i'll just be in school my whole life.

- - -

update on the four30 project is coming this weekend. i am loving it.

- - -

cutest picture of my LIFE.

+ change. i can do it. +

tomorrow:

- work, to pay my bills.
- buy a moleskine, to keep my brain in one place.
- pumpkin festival with kristin and lydia, to enjoy my life.
- FMRSM 260 homework, to be responsible.
- photos of fall, because it is what i love.


this is all that is on my list, because i am trying to keep it simple.

new project here: four30.

+ it's fall +

thanks to feeling sick and just generally down yesterday morning, i left work early and decided to just 'have a good day.' instead of working on my to-do list, i just did my best to enjoy the incredible weather. amazingly enough, i found a beautiful antique desk for my room on my walk through the short north (item on my to-do list), finished my homework (another item) at an amazing new little coffee shop i found (travonna) and listened to my friend joey & some other boys play some acoustic sets while i worked! i also took some photos just for fun (third item on that list) on that walk that i took. i'm starting to get along with columbus. i've resolved to take half days off at least once a week for the rest of the year. or, indefinitely. i feel like a new person, and like my life is back.

here are some of the pretty things i saw yesterday, including a picture of yours truly. :)

+ this is what he's for +

so often i feel like the child
that is
sitting on the ground waiting patiently
for my daddy
to finish building my bridge
so i can get across the river
while i'm laughed at by the neighbor boy
that taunts me for needing
someone else's help
and brags
that he doesn't need HIS
daddy's help
because he is big enough
grown up enough
to do it himself now.
and it hurts.
and i sit
and stare at my hands
and wonder if maybe
maybe
i'm just too small,
not enough.
but then i realize,
as i tiptoe across my new bridge
made just for me
that the neighbor boy is still
stranded
because he can't find long and strong
enough sticks
and everything keeps
breaking
despite all his efforts
indeed more effort than my own
and that on top of this
he is alone.
and it hurts.
and all i want to do
is go back
and take him by the hand
and kiss him on the forehead
and walk him across my bridge
and say it's okay,
this
this is what daddies are for.

+ c.s. lewis +

A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word 'darkness' on the walls of his cell.

I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else.

Miracles are a retelling in small letters of the very same story which is written across the whole world in letters too large for some of us to see.

If I discover within myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world.

+ question: why are we an aesthetic people? +

bloggers: i'm sure you've stumbled on someone's blog and left it before reading anything because the design instantly discredited anything they had to say.

web designers: i'm sure you've gotten so fed up with horrendous fonts and layouts that you decided it wasn't worth even digging around a site to find what you want.

bookworms: i'm sure you've passed up hundreds of books because the cover art looked like it was designed in paint.

musicians: i'm sure you've clicked off a myspace page before you got 10 seconds into their default song because their layout screamed either buttrock or isuckattheinternet.

and everyone: i'm sure you've never spoken to someone or not considered a friendship because they just didn't look how you want your friends to look.


if i'm being painfully honest, i am guilty of all these things. but for some reason, only the last causes a consciencious twinge in the core of your heart. and it should. or should it?

isn't this all the same? isn't this simply judging the value of content by the quality of the visual?

why is it justified in every single area, with the exception of people?

this is something that is clearly built into us, and i'm sorry, but it is not a symptom of our culture. yes, society places too high of value on the surface, but that is only pushing a few steps further what already is by nature. so,

why are we such an aesthetic people?

if beauty is found only in the eye of the beholder, and if you should never judge a book by its cover, and if looks and brains rarely come in the same package, why do we always choose the aesthetically pleasing over the not?

- - -

look in these eyes
we know each other like our own skin and bones
we know the scars,
how they got where they are,
in places no one else knows.

I'll watch you falling from me
when you hit the ground maybe you'll see
the only way to fall is down
and I'll be up in the stars
but I'll be anywhere you are
just say you need me and I'll come down

- - -

today's playlist [perfect fall music]:
swimming with dolphins, lily allen, lydia, the maine, myriad, sleeping at last, copeland, as cities burn, edison glass, i can make a mess like nobody's business, death cab for cutie, brightlights, carolina liar

+ sick for what i've lost +

- - -
i don't know which i like best.

+ weekend finds. +

lots of thrifting, rummage sales, and fun surprises this weekend. i would do this every day of my life if i could.

*a lot of people have asked how i got this lighting/coloring for this photo. i used my 580ex and bounced it off the ceiling. in LR2 i bumped up the clarity, vibrance, shadows, recovery and exposure, and bumped down the saturation a bit.

i also stole a nice little piece of wood from a neighbor's trash bin on yesterday's walk and started to hang up some of the necklaces i've been working on.



close up...



- - -

okay, more to come soon. sleep time.

- - -

p.s. i drew this for lydia this evening...we laughed, thought i'd share:

+ flowers. +

nicholas made these for me. i love them, so i thought i would share. :)
*edit: this isn't showing, so until i get home and can fix it, you can view them here.

- - -

i wish my wall looked like this:

and my room looked like this:

and my closet looked like this:

i will make it happen.

- - -

I wish we could open our eyes
To see in all directions at the same time
Oh what a beautiful view
If you were never aware of what was around you
And it is true what you said
That I live like a hermit in my own head
But when the sun shines again
I'll pull the curtains and blinds to let the light in.

Sorrow drips into your heart through a pinhole
Just like a faucet that leaks and there is comfort in the sound
But while you debate half empty or half full
It slowly rises, your love is gonna drown

Your love is gonna drown

- - -
these are beautiful.