I was going to write a long post about how I've been cutting things out of my life. How I left most of my artwork, clothes, and letters I've held onto for years back in Ohio last month. How I stood over a small fire in my back alley, watching years of court documents and condemning letters burn into ash before my eyes. I wanted to write about coming to terms with missing relationships in my life; ones I desperately want, but cannot have. About the pain that comes with little deaths, and the joy that stubbornly arrives the morning after. About the silly things: unfollowing, unsubscribing, and hemming in my heart in a way I never have. And to write about how I've learned to instantly toss out anything that reminds me of a past life; a woman who I used to be, but am no longer.
I wanted to tell you all to jealously protect the life you want to create; to share how I've chosen to let go of things, people, and memories. And how I wish someone had given me the strength to do it years ago.
But all I can write is that I now know the difference between yesterday and tomorrow. That I will never live in either of them. But that my place will forever stand right here, in the middle, called "Today."
Today, I have to decide if Jesus is enough for me. Today, I will learn to wrestle with the hope of heaven. Today, I will be content in not knowing the answers - and no longer being concerned that I do not know. Today, I will sit and hear stories of girls with broken pasts and broken hearts, desperate for love, and say, "I have found no answer other than Jesus."
Today I will choose to act on the truth I know, even when I do not understand it.
Today I will choose to trust in love that was proven by death on a cross, even when I don't feel it.
Today I will choose to believe that I was made beautiful, even when I cannot see it.
My yesterday is dead, and my tomorrow has not yet been born.
Today is the only day that is alive. And for the very first time, I am going to live it.
I am out of words, so I made this pretty little thing to remind us all that it's hard to slough off the past, but so worth it. Feel free to Pin it, tweet it, blog it, put it on your bathroom mirror, anything. Also, I just finished re-designing my new sister-in-law's blog, so you should take a peek & say hello to her.
What have you cut out of your life recently? What do you need to let go of? Do you need prayer for the courage to do so? I want to hear. Leave it in the comments.